Haven't been writing much. But I guess today is something worth writing about.
I've been sick since thursday. Wednesday was Marcus's birthday. We pelted him with water balloons and after that had a very nice lasagna and spaghetti made by Darren, and a super nice chocolate cheesecake by Sarah. Yum.
But on thursday morning, woke up with this super crappy sore-throat, that turned into a raging fever on thursday. Thankfully, I only worked a couple of hours on Thursday as it was training against for Fry's. I took 2 days off from Melbourne Uni. Although Melbourne Uni pays so much better. All for the saturday work. :P But I reckon it'll pay off itself eventually.
Was pretty sick on Thursday, so I sat in for 3.5 hours, and then took a day off on Friday because didn't feel like going, although on Friday my fever was mostly gone, but still had a awful sore-throat and was yaking out phlegm all day.
Haha, the crazy part was I went for Friday's overnight prayer. We prayed from 10pm to 6am. I stayed the entire time. Praying that I don't get sick! But it was awesome. Although I was seeking for a manifested presence of God, but God's presence was still there. Didn't really cried.. or wait... maybe I did. But yeah, we worshiped, we prayed in tongues continually, and just had a great time fellowshipping and praying amongst brothers and sisters of Christ.
The heroes were definitely the people who came to pray. I'm so blown-away by the turnout. Although there was close to 300 people that the room was just bursting at its seams during the first watch, which was 10pm to midnight. But people started leaving soon after. Finally by around 6am, there was still about 150+ people. Which is still very amazing, it's still very encouraging to see so many people turnout for prayer and lasting about 8 hours of prayer!
Haha, We had 3 breaks in between, a break every 2 hours for 20 minutes. So technically prayer and worship was about 7 hours, with 1 hour break. But it's good and necessary. Some of the funniest scenes were girls falling asleep while praying. They get into this praying poster, squatting or kneeling on the ground, with their head down... and zzzzz. Lol.
Yeah, so finally it finished at 6am sharp. Went home, took a shower, I was sweating so much, that my jeans was soaking. I drank up to 3 bottles of water. The room was not well ventilated, we had fans on all the doors, it wasn't super stuffy, but it did get warm at times.
Slept for about 1.5 hours, and now here I am at work in Fry's self storage. It's 10:25am. Praying for time to pass by quickly, so I can go home and continue by good well-earned rest! Oh, I lost my voice! Haha.
Friday, November 30, 2007
Thursday, November 8, 2007
The encourager?
This is a funny perspective. I don't know how much truth is there in it, but was just thinking about it in the shower, and was pondering on it, and asking God about it.
But it's also concerning having a girl.
One of the biggest flaws about Nicole, was that she could not be an encourager of my life.
It's a strange notion. I used to think I liked girls who are inquisitive, intelligent and good conversationalist. Although that is absolutely true about Nicole, she even thinks logically, but the greatest flaw about thinking logically is the inability to act which is commonly found in girls. Hehehe.
But aside from that, One great thing I've found out is,
I am a great encourager. It is a gift from God for me to lift people up, and be a great source of encouragement. A lot of people has pointed that out in me. I do believe I have the gift, as described in Romans 12:8 - "If it is encouraging, let him encourage".
But the thing I realised about myself as well, is, that I am able to encourage others, but I too need a lot of encouragement. Finding a girl who is able to lift you up when you are down, to build you up with words of wisdom and words from God is a great gift.
She can make you rise up amongst the ashes of disappointments, be the moonlight that shines a path amidst the pitch black darkness of hopelessness and she'll never ever allows you to wallow in self-pity but stirs you up in you a fiery vengeance to seek God for restoration and gets for you your sling for you to slay the giant who dare taunts the army of the one and only living God.
So far I thank God that I have a lot of great women of encouragement in my life. Namely, my mother and my sister. I wouldn't mind having my own personal encouragement.
Although, one thing I need to keep in mind, is that the greatest Encourager is the Holy Spirit, He is the great comforter that truly is the refreshment to my soul.
That being said, putting all your emotions and sorrow into one, can seriously weigh him or her down, and even the greatest of encourager's can feel down and emotionally driven, hence casting your cares unto Jesus for He cares for you, can never weigh him down.
But nevertheless, getting a woman that encourages you.. is powerful.
But it's also concerning having a girl.
One of the biggest flaws about Nicole, was that she could not be an encourager of my life.
It's a strange notion. I used to think I liked girls who are inquisitive, intelligent and good conversationalist. Although that is absolutely true about Nicole, she even thinks logically, but the greatest flaw about thinking logically is the inability to act which is commonly found in girls. Hehehe.
But aside from that, One great thing I've found out is,
I am a great encourager. It is a gift from God for me to lift people up, and be a great source of encouragement. A lot of people has pointed that out in me. I do believe I have the gift, as described in Romans 12:8 - "If it is encouraging, let him encourage".
But the thing I realised about myself as well, is, that I am able to encourage others, but I too need a lot of encouragement. Finding a girl who is able to lift you up when you are down, to build you up with words of wisdom and words from God is a great gift.
She can make you rise up amongst the ashes of disappointments, be the moonlight that shines a path amidst the pitch black darkness of hopelessness and she'll never ever allows you to wallow in self-pity but stirs you up in you a fiery vengeance to seek God for restoration and gets for you your sling for you to slay the giant who dare taunts the army of the one and only living God.
So far I thank God that I have a lot of great women of encouragement in my life. Namely, my mother and my sister. I wouldn't mind having my own personal encouragement.
Although, one thing I need to keep in mind, is that the greatest Encourager is the Holy Spirit, He is the great comforter that truly is the refreshment to my soul.
That being said, putting all your emotions and sorrow into one, can seriously weigh him or her down, and even the greatest of encourager's can feel down and emotionally driven, hence casting your cares unto Jesus for He cares for you, can never weigh him down.
But nevertheless, getting a woman that encourages you.. is powerful.
Monday, November 5, 2007
The inheritance?
Just a thought when I got home.
I was remembering one of my friend saying that he needs to pay back his parents for his education. To me, was "Really?, Ouch!" Considering that he studied in Australia, that would be a very heavy payload needing to pay back his parents.
I wonder if he was lying or really telling the truth. Now, that friend isn't the most honest, and have been known to tell tall tale stories just to feel comforted and or attention seeking. As he told me that after a moment thought after I was telling him how I was working for my living expense. Plus he hasn't been one who cared about his studies, always playing away and never ever studying, hence he's been failing and repeating exams left right centre. It might just be his mom threatening to study.
Theoretically, if I had to pay my parents back for education fee's, I'll do it in Malaysia. At least I have a better hope, or if not, I'll study 2 years in Australia, attempt to do my craziest and get my PR, and then have a better chance.
Education is a crazy investment to spend on going overseas. Unless you have a goal in life, that you cannot fail. But looking at my friend, either thats the truth or he's been cracking under the pressure, which I doubt it's the case as well.
---
But aside from that, just thinking about the idea, it's quite sad. Needing to pay your parents back for your education. Maybe it's because I've been raised in a great loving family who only wants the best for me. Maybe it's because I'm Christian? I don't know. But to have parents who give to their children sacrificially, I know that I am not just a expensive investment. But I am truly a extremely loved child for them to go all-out.
My parents tried to give me the best, that I know. Although financial concerns got in the way. But nevertheless, for my dad willing to spend his retirement fund on me without too much thinking, it was a great gesture of love.
In a way, I have to say, I haven't been producing the results in proportionate. I think since coming to Australia, I've grown and learned to appreciate their gift. Especially now that I'm working part-time just to survive. I realized that I cannot afford to fail, and it's the best they can give, it's on my part now. It's weird, because I used to think I know this, but I never really knew, just looking back.
I wish sometimes I can relive year 1 uni again. I would have done things a lot differently. I had a lot of wrong concepts on life, and bitterness towards a lot of things. And I would have changed my study ethics a lot differently. Personally looking back, I feel really immature. Thats the strangest part.
---
Maybe I might want to paraphrase myself. In no way I am looking at this from a condemning point of view, but rather from a thoughtful perspective of how I could do better.
Ok, coming back to children's education. I personally don't see your child as an investment. But a continuation of my legacy. I personally believe that my parents with whatever they had, they brought me up with a lot of love and a lot of care. Although now with exposure, I wish they had done better, but it is for me to carry on what I've learned, and expand on it.
It is the inheritance of knowledge. That my dad from Kelantan, looking at his awful childhood, he grew up knewing what he knew. One thing I wish he did was paid more attention to my education though, especially since he was a brilliant student, and I'm not. As teaching your kids to learn is something I would definitely teach my kids.
Although much can be said about the above,
One thing I loved about my parents as there wasn't much illogical pressure. In that they are not reliving their dreams and hopes through us but letting us learn our own paths. Perhaps there could have been some better level of guidance, but I think thats another separate thing to think about.
---
I like the idea of inheritance. We are all spiritual inheritance to those who believe in Christ Jesus. But not to go there too much, inheritance, to receive something that you have not paid for.
I like what Pastor Bill Johnson says "Maturity is expensive, inheritance is free". Where your parents toil just to give us the best, we are to bring it to the next level, from the lessons learned, passed down, to bring the family, to bring the legacy into the next level.
Proverbs 13:22 - A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children's children: and the wealth of the sinner is laid up for the just.
There are many stories of generational blessings if we are bothered to study them. Some really amazing stories, like even the Bush family is one of them. From having presidents, to senators, and people of all great walks of life. And the Waltons, Hiltons, and other great families.
Inheritance. Leaving a legacy. To see your actions affecting generations down is quite a scary thought, but at the same time, also a glorious thought.
I was remembering one of my friend saying that he needs to pay back his parents for his education. To me, was "Really?, Ouch!" Considering that he studied in Australia, that would be a very heavy payload needing to pay back his parents.
I wonder if he was lying or really telling the truth. Now, that friend isn't the most honest, and have been known to tell tall tale stories just to feel comforted and or attention seeking. As he told me that after a moment thought after I was telling him how I was working for my living expense. Plus he hasn't been one who cared about his studies, always playing away and never ever studying, hence he's been failing and repeating exams left right centre. It might just be his mom threatening to study.
Theoretically, if I had to pay my parents back for education fee's, I'll do it in Malaysia. At least I have a better hope, or if not, I'll study 2 years in Australia, attempt to do my craziest and get my PR, and then have a better chance.
Education is a crazy investment to spend on going overseas. Unless you have a goal in life, that you cannot fail. But looking at my friend, either thats the truth or he's been cracking under the pressure, which I doubt it's the case as well.
---
But aside from that, just thinking about the idea, it's quite sad. Needing to pay your parents back for your education. Maybe it's because I've been raised in a great loving family who only wants the best for me. Maybe it's because I'm Christian? I don't know. But to have parents who give to their children sacrificially, I know that I am not just a expensive investment. But I am truly a extremely loved child for them to go all-out.
My parents tried to give me the best, that I know. Although financial concerns got in the way. But nevertheless, for my dad willing to spend his retirement fund on me without too much thinking, it was a great gesture of love.
In a way, I have to say, I haven't been producing the results in proportionate. I think since coming to Australia, I've grown and learned to appreciate their gift. Especially now that I'm working part-time just to survive. I realized that I cannot afford to fail, and it's the best they can give, it's on my part now. It's weird, because I used to think I know this, but I never really knew, just looking back.
I wish sometimes I can relive year 1 uni again. I would have done things a lot differently. I had a lot of wrong concepts on life, and bitterness towards a lot of things. And I would have changed my study ethics a lot differently. Personally looking back, I feel really immature. Thats the strangest part.
---
Maybe I might want to paraphrase myself. In no way I am looking at this from a condemning point of view, but rather from a thoughtful perspective of how I could do better.
Ok, coming back to children's education. I personally don't see your child as an investment. But a continuation of my legacy. I personally believe that my parents with whatever they had, they brought me up with a lot of love and a lot of care. Although now with exposure, I wish they had done better, but it is for me to carry on what I've learned, and expand on it.
It is the inheritance of knowledge. That my dad from Kelantan, looking at his awful childhood, he grew up knewing what he knew. One thing I wish he did was paid more attention to my education though, especially since he was a brilliant student, and I'm not. As teaching your kids to learn is something I would definitely teach my kids.
Although much can be said about the above,
One thing I loved about my parents as there wasn't much illogical pressure. In that they are not reliving their dreams and hopes through us but letting us learn our own paths. Perhaps there could have been some better level of guidance, but I think thats another separate thing to think about.
---
I like the idea of inheritance. We are all spiritual inheritance to those who believe in Christ Jesus. But not to go there too much, inheritance, to receive something that you have not paid for.
I like what Pastor Bill Johnson says "Maturity is expensive, inheritance is free". Where your parents toil just to give us the best, we are to bring it to the next level, from the lessons learned, passed down, to bring the family, to bring the legacy into the next level.
Proverbs 13:22 - A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children's children: and the wealth of the sinner is laid up for the just.
There are many stories of generational blessings if we are bothered to study them. Some really amazing stories, like even the Bush family is one of them. From having presidents, to senators, and people of all great walks of life. And the Waltons, Hiltons, and other great families.
Inheritance. Leaving a legacy. To see your actions affecting generations down is quite a scary thought, but at the same time, also a glorious thought.
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